update update, from today i have exactly 23 days left at work and my career hangs in the balance as i await news from a prospective employer who i've seen for 3 interviews last week. It's now tuesday, i'm telling you, you just can't go wrong in offering me the job my friends, you just can't, so pick up the phone dial my number and tell me what i need to know and everyone will be happy. Well at least tell me before i go away next week!

my xbox got jiggied, now i can play lots of games, which is good and bad. Good because i can play lots of games whenever i want, bad because playing lots of games too much isn't really that good.

i'm still a bit under the weather. endless supply of mucus i tellsya.

tired and sleepy on this monday afternoon.

i'm dreaming of a... summer holiday.

1st december today it is. 1st day of summer today it is. there's nothing worth writing about, actually i could tell you about how i can hear my echo when i get into work every morning, but who'd want to read about that. boring. bored.

i got myself one of these and now it feels like i've got square eyes.

on a break from work this morning, i was sipping my red bull (cos everyone knows i have chronic fatigue syndrome every morning) with my back towards to sun, all of a sudden in my field of vision everything started to darken, argh, i thought i was going to black out until i realised the sun just crept behind a cloud. bitch arse!

infuse for 4 minutes for a stronger coffee.

this instant coffee bag thing is crap, maybe i've over-infused. infuse is just a funky way of saying "leave it in the hot water"

"dunk the coffee bag for a better result" - i always, ALWAYS dunk my bags, everyone does, i dunked it quite vigorously as well.

anyways, that was a major let down and it was a reknown coffee brand as well, only goes to show, never trust anything 'instant'.

i saw the coffee bag sample stuck on the front cover of this week's publication of the city weekly. now i can at least say i've tried instant coffee, i saw, dunked and infused it.

it's difficult for me attach a 'regret factor' to something so trivial such as instant coffee, but the lesson remains, give it a try or regret not trying, and remember tomorrow is a brand new day.

now i'm going to try thick slices of raw fish.

i'm by myself,

on the side of a bus i see an ad with four girls in bikinis

it goes

"why do one... dufour"

then i crack up like a spastic.

I've changed, a lot, i don't know if i'm an improved or worse version of myself.

I've lost something, i feel incomplete. definately.

Friends that i've known for awhile never told me about my bad traits probably afraid of tearing a whole in my esteem, perhaps. I see my own flaws, every level headed person should be able to see their own flaws, but what if there's a blind spot? Things you don't see about yourself that isn't all that pleasant. Do people have to make it painfully clear to you before you decide to take a step back and give yourself some constructive criticism?

"accepting yourself is the first step to happiness" - that's hunky dory if you know what your good and bad traits are, cos you can work with what you know - keep the good and throw away the bad, but then we have those blind spots you know nothing about.

don't say ignorance is bliss, cos then you'll drive all your friends away and cease to make any new friends.

i hate being ignorant, it's just perceived as being inconsiderate, and at the end of the day your intentions don't count if it's not perceived properly.

i'm quite a nice person, really i am.

something i wrote on the train awhile back, i found it in the depths of my backpack.

~

it was ryan's last day today, he's leaving us for a spiffy new job with nicer tables, better computers and comfier chairs. I had my second interview with a spiffy new company as well, getting the job would be nice, but i'm not too worried if i don't, not right now anyways.
ryan held his farewell drinks at the dendy bar. now there's only 3 people left from the nine i started working with two and a half years ago. i guess they're waiting for their fat redundancy cheque, yeah, the cheque would be nice.
the girl who sits next to me at work says that my tie made me look like a highschooler, i laughed in her face condescendingly, she picks on me at work, so i don't like her very much.
i had a 'kransky' whilst waiting for the train, it's a red vulgar looking sausage. i kept it in the paper bag hiding it from view. though it's vulgar looking, it tastes pretty good...
erghh, now i'm starting to feel it, the sausage is causing a ripple effect in the sea of beer that's housed in my stomach.
i'm going to sleep now, i should feel better when i wake up.

~

since that entry, there's only one person left from my original team, and i didn't get that spiffy job i was interviewed for.

we sunk the unsinkable.

the steam-titanic had become just another regular steam-boat.

...and don't be greedy.

"if it doesn't kill you, it'll make you stronger"

i drew up a detailed budget this evening.



i'm too distraught to continue writing.

once upon a time, some poor homeless bastard got so hungry he started to eat diposed tyres.

Softened to some extent, we now call it licorice.

i tried this lunch-sized thai chilli chicken pizza the other day, today, i tried the spicy pepperoni pizza.

i'd say, they've mixed up their adjectives.

i was watching sami's section on weather this morning. Sami was at martin place in the middle a bunch of lavenders, she asked me to come down to check out the lavenders when i had a chance. So, i got changed, caught the train and got to martin place.

i saw the lavenders, i saw sami and her news crew, then i went to work.

there's this one mandarin song i've started listening to recently, i don't know what the guy's singing about, to me it could be a happy or sad song depending on my mood.

perception, control it or be controlled.

actions speak louder than words, and speculation leads you off into a tangent usually making you oblivious to the truth.

been writing a lot of incoherent crap lately, so this will be a change of some sort.

hello.

i'm running out of time, it's just past twelve mid night and i haven't started the dvd yet, i know i don't have work tomorrow, but still, i have to hurry this entry through before i can start the dvd, i must. i'm not on the dole, but i have run an errand and pay a visit to the local centrelink tomorrow, that's going to waste some time as well. if i could only convert the time i've wasted from "waiting" i think i'd feel less rushed right now. i'd wait for the train, then i'd have to wait for the train to get to wherever, that's like two hours of waiting on a round trip. i'd have to wait my turn for the bathroom each morning, i also have to wait for people i meet up with for lunch - damn my punctuality. Then wait for my food, no wonder why people go for fast food, that damned skinless chicken laksa took forever, and it didn't even have shallots sprinkled on the top of it. now i have to wait til tomorrow to go wait in line in the waiting room at centrelink. in the meantime, play that dvd i say.

that was fun.

i've started buying coffee at this new place that my colleague frequents, his name is kevin but the guys behind the coffee machine call him "hash", kevin tells me a while ago they thought that he looked like a marijuana dealer and the name stuck ever since. strange, perhaps they caught him with little sachets of hash pinned up against the inside of his trench coat doing his rounds on martin place, or or or, when everyone else was having a smoke break, kevin pulled out his twin-chambered bong and started smoking on his own supplies whilst sipping on the flat white he bought from the same place. i normally get a cap, one time i got myself a flat white, and well.. it tastes exactly the same as a cap except with less froth, is that the only difference? is it?! is it?! hmm, well tickle me blind. anyway, kevin is english, thin, pale and homosexual, so if he was dealing or abusing anything it'll be those harder type drugs like heroin, not to stereotype heroin abusers to be thin, pale and gay - they're just thin and pale.

a familiar smile amongst the crowd, i had been waiting five minutes and i was hungry, but alas she'd arrived and soon enough the smile had turned into a half giggle, so i subtly checked my fly and blew my nose, but i never found out what she had been laughing at.

did you bring your lunch?
yeah i'm still on that detox thing
you know it's kinda pointless, cos you've already blown it by having those krispy kreme doughnuts on the weekend and not to mention you'll be loading up on bad stuff later on anyway.
*shrugs* i suppose, but i've only got 4 days left..

i bought my lunch and she was making her detoxifying rabbit sandwich, and as i sat down i was thinking to myself - what a great friend i have. at the time there was no reason nor doubt, i had knew it all along so i guess writing about it was all that's left to do.

she knows me well, or at least, i think she knows me well. we have different social agendas, though they occasionally coincide, we normally update and give each other transparency into our lives and more importantly into other peoples lives.

sometimes, our conversations will start with 'did you know that so and so is..' and ending with 'oh my gosh i never knew that..' or 'are you FER REAL?!'

then we'd fill in the rest of our time with meaningless chatter about things like titanium tongs, kimchee, beef bulgogi and justin timberlake, and for that i am grateful.

these starburst sour gummi worms taste fan-fan-fantastic on this f-f-fine day..

fine wouldn't do this day any justice, stupendously brilliant would be a more appropriate description.

during this stupendously brilliant day my attention was diverted to a conversation about Geishas amongst my colleagues sitting next to me. one girl says, essentially they're prostitutes, straight out no explanation whatsoever, just prostitutes. she rests her case. talk to the hand. period.

err ok then.

though, i'd like to disagree, just for argument sake, by definition they are:

"One of a class of professional women in Japan trained from girlhood in conversation, dancing, and singing in order to entertain professional or social gatherings of men."

that's their job description, however, they do sleep with men, but only at the discretion of that Geisha. Then you have prostitutes, their job description differ ever so slightly, so slightly in fact that my colleague finds it indistinguishable! sad.

~

gee it's a stupendously brilliant day.

~

...i was sitting on the bench waiting for my train home the other night, a girl sits next to me, then she spots her friend walking along the platform and she shouts out to get her attention, her friend comes over:

girl sitting next to me: "i spent 25 minutes on the treadmill tonight, oh my gawd, i was going to die, apparently the doctor says i have low blood pressure, so i think i need a bit more sugar in my diet"

then her friend continues to walk down the platform.

another friend approaches:

same girl sitting next to me before: "i spent 25 minutes on the treadmill tonight, oh my gawd, i was going to die, apparently the doctor says i have low blood pressure, so i think i need a bit more sugar in my diet"

then her friend walks off.

i get on the train, i sit down in the row of seats behind the girl that sat next to me on the platform, and just as i was about to doze off into oblivion another friend gets on the train and sits next to her... guess what?

the same girl that sat next to me on the platform: "i spent 25 minutes on the treadmill..."

i could've almost mimed her conversation milli vanilli style, but that'd be rude.

admittedly, i do the same thing as well, everyone does, unless you blog it of course, cos it'll look stupid if you post it twice?

~

i'm almost over my sickness, i got an extra box of aloe vera tissues, so i need to only go through 100 more sheets of tissue to get that one bar code to enter the competition.

~

my friend got himself an apartment, and i'm so jealous, cereal.

~

i need to go get some biscuits now, but everyone sticks their hands in there right after their toilet break. i'm not quite sure what makes biscuits so appealing right after a toilet break, that kinda puts me off, but the trick is to goto the store room and open up a completely new packet of biscuits.

~

Q: what's the deal with all these '~' ?
A: dunno, looks kinda cool.

i am sick.

from what? who knows. i woke up not feeling the best, by 11am i've used up half a box of kleenex aloe vera tissues, that's 50 sheets at three plies per sheet of snotty yucky mucus, very charming, i know.

they say that these aloe vera tissues help sooth the irrititations from repetitive nose blowing, i say: "bullcrap!". My little bin under my desk is filled to the brim with scrunched up tissues and i bet the very next time i blow my nose, it'll come right off. I'll lose my nose, it'll never to be located, then how ridiculous would i look? Walkin' around without a freakin' nose for crying out loud. I'd try the lost and found box, but that'll be pressing my luck though, i mean, who'll be silly enough to pick up a missing nose and place it in the lost and found box, yes i completely agree, it's highly unlikely.

Though, not all has been lost, on the underside of the tissue box there's a sneezin' season competition, you could win: a holiday to Canada worth $15,000, a Breville Espresso machine or one of 200 fluffy duck slippers. Personally i prefer the duck slippers cos i hate cold feet. Now, all i have to do is buy 2 more boxes of these tissues and send in the bar codes and bobs your uncle. If this fluey-type sickness keeps up, i might have a chance of going through all 3 boxes and be in the running for the duck slippers, but i fear my nose won't be able to make it.

i met her about a day ago, she's 37, i can see it written all over her but she's never revealed her exact date of birth. she's been through quite a lot, a bit rough around the edges, though she looks in pretty good shape for her age. she doesn't say much nor does she do much, she sits there gracefully watching her life pass by, perhaps the last 37 years had been too eventful and now she'd like to rest in a bit of peace, or so it seems until i trade her off of course. i flip her over and i see a platypus in a body of water and a '20' written next to it. i flip her over again, and i take a closer look, "Elizabeth II Australia 1966".

..i was born in vietnam but i don't speak a word of it.
my dad was born and raised in cambodia.
my mum was born and raised in vietnam.
both sets of grandparents are 100% chinese.
ergo, i have 100% chinese blood and i speak a dialect of chinese so brokenly, i don't even try to compensate by using english for the words i don't know how to pronounce in chinese, i just go "errr" or there's complete and utter silence. i "err" alot, i think i do, in fact, i find myself erring everytime i speak to either of my parents, so, now along with our culture gap, we have (usually the parents, actually it's always the parents! always! haa) this "no understand" syndrome. it's not that bad really. but cos of these reasons, they've objected to some of the bigger decisions i've made, and because i want to make my own decisions they think i'm disrespecting them. Nonsense, of course i'd like to get their blessing but at the end of the day it's my decision. And why is it always about "respect"? why? why? why? i doooo, i do respect them, they just fail to see that. You know what it is? it's the fact that you haven't done things 'their' way and they ain't happy about that, not one bit my friend.

haa!

i know what it is! it's the weather! errr no it's not.

you haven't seen your old friends in ages, but they have their own agendas, their own lives to run, they don't really need to see you anymore. errk that's sad. is this what i've become? a nomad? you haven't paid your bill, it's been sitting there for awhile now, actually they've sent you an overdue notice, great, i'll wait for the final warning then in that case, i'm just too lazy. let's eat. let's. i've eaten too much, again. why do i do this to myself, i don't know, it's not that bad really, once won't kill, not unless it becomes a habit. thoughts are moving too fast, i try to write it down quickly but i can't capture everything, nor do i want to write down everything, not here, not for the world to see, it's a damn shame, you used to be happier you know, yeah i've realised that, or so it seems anyway. hey, you can move out soon too, yeah i know i can but i can't think that far ahead, do you know how to cook? clean? wash? argh, let's reassess at another time, it's late. yeah, so you and i haven't seen our friends in awhile, they don't care about you, well not as much as they did in the past, well, they're all hitched if you didn't realise they don't have time for you anymore, i guess not, but you're upset yes? a little, i've accepted it, then why are you writing about it now? cos i'm bored and it happened to cross my mind, you mean you've been thinking about it, a little, no alot, but it's not just that, other things as well i guess, what are you talking about? what do you mean other things? why i'm writing instead of sleep at four in the morning. what is it? i'm not sure, yes you are, you just don't want to talk about it, you're afraid you'll be judged, by whom? people who read this blog, people you know, it doesn't matter what people think of me, oh yes you do, you say you don't but you really do care that's why you've been writing about trivial matters, like you and your stupid car. i'm bored now, me too, go to sleep then, i don't want to cos the weekends too short i need to maximise my consciousness, err but you're bored, yes i am and i'll keep typing, and what will that achieve? nothing, just so there's an entry on my blog site for my friends to read, huh? what? for your friends to read about your little boring entry you wrote at four in the morning? can we find a topic please? yes, how about your room's in a mess and you have unpaid bills sitting on your table, we've talked about that already, ok then, how about that little monkey she gave you that's still sitting on top of your monitor, what about it? well aren't you going to take it down doesn't it remind you of her? yes, sometimes, but i like it, it's really not that bad, fine. fine. do you like girls? of course i do! then why don't you have a target? cos there's no one, even if there was you probably won't do much cos you're all talk, yeah i am umm, then do something, do what to whom? find a whom and do what you would normally do to the whom that you're interested in, oohh we'll see you can't push the issue with these things, i'm dissapointed in you, you've lost confidence, i have? i AM confident, no you're not, am so, are not! am so! whatever. errr this entry is boring, duh! i just want to write, you know you're suppose to get up early tomorrow cos we're taking jessica out for her birthday, yeah i'll be fine, you know what? i'm actually starting to feel better after all this writing, feeling better about what? everything, everything? yeah everything, i guess i'll have to see how i feel in the morning, it might be a change for the better aye? yeah might, hehe, you're funny, i know i am, you should try to be funny all the time, you mean i'm not funny all the time? nah you're not, quite boring most of the time, you just sit there like a teenager at a bar, piss off, haha you suck, now goto sleep and do something worth your while and stop acting like you're so cool, cos you ain't, yes i am well a little cool at least, then go impress someone.

with the shake of hands, he drove away, with my beloved.

it's been almost 4 years.

bye bye my car.

Mr. Mraz is coming to the Metro, can someone say yay?!

oh my...

icbm.

hi baboons!

hi christian.

oh my...

the truth hurts for some people, but it's rather annoying for me, if you mope about something, it's just becomes pathetic..

if you take a light hearted approach to different situations, it won't affect you as much. so, where am i going with this? i don't know.

anyways, excel just crashed on me and i lost an hour worth of work, what happened to auto save?

in other news, matrix reloaded is out today, nice...

i don't like my new hair cut!
it's too short!
*sigh*
i'll give it a couple of weeks.

in other news, my car's on the trading post, it's gonna be in this weeks listing 08/05.

listening to the radio, at work, i'm bored out of my brains and it's a chore just trying to look busy, hence this entry.

i got my car back, after being in the garage for the last 4 and half months. my friend convinced me to purchase an after market bumper bar, it's now rather impractical, yes, lets sell the car.

you really want to sell the car don't you?

yes.

but you never do anything this drastic.

well, i think it's time i did, people get comfortable with routine - but it's rather bland. change is good, change breathes new air into your life, blah...

are you sure? you'll have to put an ad up in the trading post, it's too much of a hassle and you won't have any time.

whatever.

you're not going to go through this stupid 'change management' in other areas of your life are you?

perhaps.

just cruising along.

there's no objective, i feel so unmotivated - what am i working towards? where am i heading? what is my plan?!

no, nothing really, just cruising into the void.

someone inspire me!

a couple i've been long time friends with got married last night and i was the bestman.

over 10 months worth of planning went into this one day, and i gotta say, i don't think i'll ever get married, it's hard goddamn work.

this is how the whole day panned out:
got to the brides house for the traditional asian tea ceremony where the bride and groom gets draped with jewellery or lots of money plus lots of photos, then we were off to curzon hall where they say 'i do' and sign the marraige ceritificate plus lots of photos. We made our way to various landmarks around sydney for.......more photos. Under the anzac bride, on the anzac bride and at observatory hill. Three hours later, we had the reception at the Regal in the city and i had to do my speech.

it went alright i suppose, i also suppose i fucked up, whatever, the audience weren't very receptive either, 8 out of the 12 tables were fobs.

something's annoying me, but i'm not quite sure what it is. whatever.

anyways, happy birthday both - james su and mark, thanks for slobering all over me on friday night, you really made my night wonderful.

battle scars - that flaming drink you bought us mark, well whatever it was the blue alcoholic flames found its was to my thumb and that's where a whole lotta hurt started settling in. goddamnit.

i know i've said this before, but i reckon the best thing since sliced bread - mango beer.
xtn's quite beastily, two steins of that didn't even dent his amour. bow down.

pimping - it's dirty work, but someone's gotta do it.

maties

this is a truc & phuong style appreciation letter

thank you to all those people who've put in a tonne of effort in organising my birthday...

the following will contrain a lot of "thank yous" so beware....

special mentions - to all you guys who lied to me just to make the surprise work.. ALL OF YAS!! mmm except a few, those few are forgiven haa!

the TWINS/Kevin/Phi/Linda - you are DOOSHMAS OK?! just no FKN bit.....but thanks for that grain of rice, i know you don't work, but it's the thought that counts, oh yeah thank Kevin for the t-shirt - wore it two days in a row, didn't wash it, haven't washed it haaa

Brandan/Chewy/Tran/Michael Dang/Vo/Dave Nguyen - thanks for taking me out to have pizza, it was great, NOW i can use the cufflinks yo! next time NO MORE SEAFOOD pizza, that kinda sucked... and chewy, what a crazy woman, downing 2 bottles of corona, training it home, making herself look pretty then DRIVING all the way to my place, now that's a feat, and dave had to goto a car show...again, instead of my birthday .... you slack ar$e

michael dang - can you pass on my thanks to leanne.

Joanie - thanks for coming, sorry didn't have any chicken ice cream - we'll get some next time

Dave Chiang/Derek Chu - Wahroonga (sp?) boyz in the hood yo!! hope you enjoyed your time.

karen/vinh - it's a big hike for you to get to my place, you know living in lansvale and everything but TA!!

Dat/Quyen Thai - thanks for making it to drinks, i know your Tooth is still sore, but i appreciate you making an appearance and quyen, you had to train it up to the city, poor thing ahhah awwww see you soon yeah?

the st johns girls britney/natalie/janice/lizzy/yu chu - i know you guys helped out with the cooking and stuff, i give you 5 dorrah ok? that'll get you 2 and a half tequila shots at mounties, what a freaking bargain! oh yeah natalie you drunk ar$e, ta for having shots with me and err buying chips and stealing peanuts at mounties, too bad they didn't have any smith's chicken chips cos you know they rock...

jenny lee/marc "yo a$$ nigger G" fricke - hahaha - you guys had 2 parties, but you came to mine first, that's good right?

law girls - cindy/shehani/inoka - TA for coming, wouldn't be the same without yas....serious... thanks for making an appearance

sefton blokes - van/paul mach/quang/pramod/chunga - hello softies! and ya wanted to play ball instead of drinking... what the?! sorry pramod, i didn't organise the food, you could've picked out the peas and corn in the fried rice to eat haha quang, you're so beastily, how many drinks didja have?!

phi nguyen - (on the way home from city) "let's get some kebabs" then i hear him talking suspiciously in viet to someone, struggling though : "mik mak lak tor doh mah errr lakky lakky bun mi thit nouc mam" - we get to my place, oh there's food!?! and there's a party!! surely you knew!!

madeline quach & dave do.... i mean thuy "whip crack" do & dave quach - thanks ah thuy for coming drinks then pretending not to know where the hell dave is, WE ALL KNOW YOU HAVE GPS on him :) hi dave!!

XTN/Lillian - thanks for coming to drinks you guys, i understand it's a fair trek down to my place so i don't blame yas for not coming...ya b@stards!! ooohh not you lillian just christian, cos he's mah b*tch :)

mr Mark Chan - you didn't come for drinks, you went to play tennis INSTEAD, then you take 4 hours to get from homebush to my place, good effort, take a bow my friend BUT thanks for finishing off the pasta bake anyways, just come over a few more times, and you'll know my area like the back of your hand, if you do decide to come over, don't bring your eastwood gangster style...

mathew/nancy - BUSTED, big time - poor poor nancy, should've seen the look on her face friday morning on the train, i'm sorry nancy, i swear i'm not sadistic, you looked sooo cute trying to hide the truth, and mathew you're a b@stard for pushing it all on nancy - "it's nancy's friend's party".

Jason Chan - you weren't here physically, but i knew you were here in spirit, i saw you sign my card via proxy haa! so get your ar$e back in sydney quick smart and sign it properly...

THE BIG ORGANISERS

thanks Anne and James su for shoppin' for that camera, it's a bewdy, i use it all the time haha at my birthday, at the election....hell i even use it in the toilet.... u wanna see? and luggin' the dj equipment to my place must've been a b*tch, we all appreciate that James!! busting those dance moves in front of all those girls, save some of the girls for us aye?!?

Myle - you've been playing that pretend game pretty good, caught yas out with my imaginary mate "jeremy" you drama queen!! and tell your great uncle to stop lying about those stupid family dinners you have to go to - i knew you had something up your sleeves, you're lucky i didn't nit pick and bust your ar$e

minh tran - i've heard you been a big part of this all, i don't know what the hell you did, but i'm grateful buddy, i really am... thanks for driving me around... i'll drive you back when i get my car yeah? love your shirts!

nhi - oh wow - the master mind herself, well well well well well, i ought to give you a medal, but you already have one - nah, just kidding, but thanks a tonne, i didn't mean to give you a hard time, i knew something was suss, but jeremy wanted to me to goto his place haha i'll give you kiss on the cheek, sorry minh, but i have to :)

left hand girl to nhi - jemaine, at one stage jem was going to jump through that phone friday arvo and beat the crap outta me, too bad so sad, you're tough but you ain't neo!! oh yeah, matrix is coming out soon, we going to do a regency thing again like lord of the rings two towers? anyways, thanks jemaine, that card you made was an absolute gem, beats the crap out of anything i've made...

right hand girl to nhi - MEY SHIA KHOU - my sister - i wake up friday morning and what do i see on the dinner table, a big A3 sheet of paper, labelled shopping list, on it writes : to cater for 35 people HMMMMMM, pasta salad HMMMMMMMMMM potato salad HMMMMM chicken wings OH YUM!! but HMMMMMMMMM spring freaking rolls!! HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION!!

mey can you give a shout out to lu zhong and dave(what's his face) i don't have their email addresses, and myle has no manners "how's your mum?" whadda crack up and then protesting that she did in fact know his mum...liar.

i think i have had too much V this morning...

[edit 26/03/03]

sorry Chipster, best liar out of all of them, you know why? cos you're whipped "i gotta go meet sara" i had no choice - ya bastard haahha THANKS MAAAATE!!

machy

this was taken from our war debate on email today, my friend machy wrote this in response to why democratic societies ie US possess nukes, i think i was a great response.

~

We're not happy that nukes exist at all. But they do. They're currently at the
situation where to disarm would be to invite disaster. Say the US takes the
brave step of disarming. All of a sudden, countries with nukes raise an eyebrow
spying an opportunity to strike without retaliation. The situation sucks but the
nukes act as a preventative measure.

Also you seem to think that the US are a bunch of bloodthirsty savages who would
take any action to crush their foes. I'm inferring this becos you seem to think
they would use their nukes first chance they get. So why don't they? They know
the consequences. That is a detterrent in itself. As Lu said, they are a strong
democratic country. If common sense doesn't prevail in the government it will in
the people. No matter their disregard for foreign policy they still dont want to
use nukes.

Compare this to a rogue nation with nothing to lose. They will use their nukes
as soon as the end is in site. These rogue nations are usually ruled by militant
dictators. They have absolute control and noone to answer to. This is a
dangerous situation. I would rather not sit back and wait and see if they have
the common sense to NOT use the nukes. I would rather see them be disarmed.

North Korea? If it wasn't for their missile test fires over japan I probably
wouldn't consider them as much of a threat. But they openly flaunt their ability
to fire missiles. When faced with a country that is that belligerent with their
weapons I start to get fearful. Yes, US has the nukes. But have they ever
threatened other countries with missiles unless they were threatened first? It
comes down to who you can trust. While I don't agree with US foreign policy I
trust their regime to not instigate a nuclear war.

Ok, the Cold war days. Both sides had nukes with fingers poised on the triggers.
They were willing to use them IF the other side used them first. If each side
was truly willing to use them they would have. But they obey the laws of common
sense. Consequences Efe, it keeps everything even. To use a nuke would be like
exploding one on your own country due to the counterattack. This I believe keeps
everything even, I believe this is what eventually helped defuse the Cuban
missile crisis.

Yes, for the betterment of the world, everyone must disarm. Lets work toward
that goal, sure. But before we do that, lets keep the nukes from the "rogues" of
the world. One goal at a time Efe.

I could be talking out of my ass. I have no idea. All I know is I'm really
hungry and this email took longer than I expected.


~

badda-bing badda-bong

just finished playing our last corporate basketball game before the semis are due to commence, i walk into the mlc centre food court and i see 40 odd people with eyes glued to the tv set: war is now under way.

I didn't know what to think, i just wanted to get some food damn it, too much war talk.

my friends have had massive debates for and against the case for war over email, it was interesting then it got vomit-inducing, listening to my friends presenting their case. Opinions are like arseholes, everyone's got one...

can't we just talk about the cricket? and how australia's gonna rip the indians a new arsehole, that's if they beat the kenyans.

but what fun is there in that, everyone's on the same side, there's no debate... oh alright then, talk about the damned war!!

now what?

well, the cat's got my tongue...

hmmm

went to MILK at the opera house on friday night, a bunch of photos that's suppose to make you feel warm and fuzzy, jazz at the overflow was better.

went go karting sunday afternoon, now THAT was fun.

people are getting married??

When did this happen? all of a sudden i've been inundated with invites, rsvps to make, speeches to write up and suits to try out all in the name of matrimony.

When did everyone get so old? Or is it me unable to handle the fact that my life is flying past me before my eyes and i haven't the slightest clue what the hell to do except work and go out. whatever.

~

i got absolutely shattered last saturday night, and behaving rather badly. i've seen other people stumble along the footpath whilst their friends desperately try to keep them standing upright at which point i think to myself "pathetic drunk bastard..." well, that night, that pathetic drunk bastard became me.

today during lunch gem told me that the things i did at the club that night were "unacceptable".
another friend, xtn, told me over email that my behaviour was something along the lines of "fine" (i forget) however, i just did some "funny things".

oh freakin' well.

gem and knee, that challenge is still on!! you are my witnesses.

~

my car should be back ready to rock'n roll in about 2 weeks. yeah!!

welp, i'm off!!!

got my cds
packed my bags
got my footy

woohoo

will have a write up when i get back

tomorrow....i mean today will by my last day of work for ....wait for it....5 freakin' days, i'm hella happy about that. Work's been pretty dry lately, sooo it's good bye work shoes and bring on the thongs and sandals for we are off to Culburra Beach just past Nowra on the south coast of NSW. We'll be stayin' at this funky place for 4 days yeah!
i don't care if we do nothing, as long as it's far far away from this city and not being nagged by middle management about deliverables coming up or those that i've missed... whatever.

we'll be playing against SHFS in our corporate basketball game, don't ask me what that stands for, i just see it on the our timetable, hopefully we'll win and pump me up for my super long weekend...jealous?

nrma's still a bitch.

valentines day is on friday, but i won't be around, my apologies.

saturday is the 15th, again i won't be around, my apologies.

~

there are alot more unfortunate people in this world, i'm one of the luckier ones, people suffer from famine, disease, war etc.. whilst i whine about bills, missing my train for work in the morning, why i can't be on the beach on this great fkn day, and paying $6000 to fix my car, money ain't nothing, as long as you have enough to eat, good friends and good times . i should stop whining, consider myself lucky, i feel better now. HEE HEE

~

now.... what should i bring to on my trip? my FOOTY yeah!!

i have this rubber band ball, it's made from rubber bands, it's spherical, but not perfect, the bounce is fairly consistent. sometimes it might hit a lump, an imperfection, a flaw and go all over the shop, i keep bouncing it, i try to anticipate where it'll go next. The fact of the matter is, i can't. It's totally random, i guess i'll just have to run after it when it gets an odd bounce.

reminds me of myself, or better yet, my life, mostly stable, then a spanner gets thrown in the works and i have to pick up the pieces later on. it's a phase, a learning experience, tomorrow will be a new day, a brighter day. f*ck you nrma.

please make yourselves useful and visit CHIP